Today...

Today is my birthday.
No I'm not celebrating,
Reason 1 being I already did.
July 4th when my family came over to my house.
That was my party.
When people had to come over anyway.
Today what I want,
What I really really want,
is to just leave.
To not be here.
To not be at my dad's.
To be gone.
I want today to be about me leaving.
I want today to be about me seeing new things,
Meeting new people,
Doing whatever I can to be out just a little bit longer.
But that won't happen.
Not because of lack of trying,
No.
It will be because the people I love,
they live too far away to see.
And th people I can stand,
Well.
Let's just say that there's not many.
Few and far apart.
That's what the happy moments in my life have been at least.
Few and far apart.
I don't want to be emo,
depressed,
whatever.
And I'm not.
But I"m not happy.
I don't think one person truly is.
I don't think any one person could say "Everything in my life is going right.
Every single thing I want, I have.
And every single day,
I wake up with a smile on my face."
No...
We all have our rain clouds.
We all have things that make us unhappy.
That make us angry.
That make us sad.
That make us want to do something reckless.
That make us need someone...
or something to love.
So this is my opinion of what we should do to make the best:
Try to be happy with who, where, and what you are.
And if you don't know one of those things,
Don't spend your life trying to find it.
Because you'll waste your days away looking for something that you can't see.